Let the little girl Live!

So today in the morning I got up with a tad bit of anxiety at an unusual hour. Its a slow day when you get up at 6 in the morning. You watch the clock and its moving but not moving at all. As if someone out there is testing your patience. I tried to push away the negative thoughts and organize my day. I made a quick TO-DO list. Showered and dressed up as if it was my normal work day. It is day 2 of the fever. My throat was better but the joints still ached. But more than anything else it was something else that was bothering me. I was unable to cope with the stress and anxiety. I am mad at a lot of things and collectively going crazy. I have multiple things to do. My TO-DO list was as long as an A4 Sheet; but I could not concentrate. The uncertainty of the future is driving me crazy. All dressed up but no where I can drive to. Here I am sitting right in front of the notebook feeling extreme levels of sadness. All I can think of- is a little girl & how dejected she was.

So, there was this 5 year old. She was super curious and moody. She ran around the house and kept hurting her knees. You know how 5 year olds are.. easily distracted. They just want your attention when they are looking at you. You don’t pay them attention for a longer period and they are gone. One day she went to the annual fair with her father. Distracted to get a toy, she walked ahead leaving her father’s hand. The place was super crowded and she was so small, she just couldn’t find him anylonger. She just lost him. She was a brave little girl. She kept walking straight hoping to find her father soon. She did not cry. She kept searching for him. She noticed the ground vacating. She stood there unable to hold her tears anylonger. Seeing her cry a few stall-owners gathered, consoled her and gave her food to eat. They decided to father her jointly and assured her that they would help her unite with her lost father. She was so jovial and lovable, everyone welcomed her to sit with them for some time. She kept changing stalls and kept rotating hoping she would finally find her father. Days passed by. Although she started her days happy and full of hope, she was dejected by the end of it. Not that people she met didn’t love her, they loved her in their little ways. But she was searching for something else.. confused and sad forever because she could not find her father. She could not go home.

I am just as dejected as this little girl about life right now. But life doesn’t give a shit about what you think. Its crazy how days like this makes you sound like a loser and all your achievements a joke. I feel like a lost 5 year old standing on a crossroad unable to decide which way to go. For the love of God, please let the little girl live!